Radiation Day 1

So it begins. Monday the 29th I started my 15 day regimine of radiation at Hunterdon Medical Center. Radiation itself wasn't so bad as it lasted only about 20 minutes and was generally painless. I'm sporting new tatoo's on my chin, neck, chest and rib cage so I'm sowing my oats feeling kind of manly and all until about 8pm. Then it's like I have a 10 lb. brick in my chest, can't catch my breath, feeling pain in my fingers, hands, feet and joints and extremely tired. So it begins again and this is only day 1. I'm into this battle 5 months now and many of you have been with me for the whole ride thank you. Unfortunately I feel like I'm starting to break down mentally and that has been one of the strengths that has gotten me this far. Radiation while painless is an unknown. Chemo I could see and feel and felt comfortable it was something I could dominate. I no longer have that feeling. Radiation can cause other cancers like lung cancer or attack major organs including your heart. That unknown X factor scares me. I could handle losing a battle to a cancer that attacked my body, not sure I could handle losing a battle to radiation that destroyed my healthy organs. I know I wouldnt be ok with that. So it's wait and see for now and that's cool with me. As always I have all of you for support and that get's me through. I have 14 treatments over the upcoming 3 weeks that will accumulate and get worse and worse making me weak and sickly. They may have to burn out my windpipe to the point I won't be able to swallow or eat. I'm ready for it and loading up the calories now best I can. There isn't any way they're putting a feeding tube down my throat and I've communicated that to my Radiologist quite clearly and I think he's feeling the pressure as he was a shade pale white yesterday. Haha no I wouldn't but he doesn't need to know it I like the pressure it kind of gives me a leg up. He got me yesterday as I lay motionless in my radiation mold inside the machine he got on the intercom and said " so how bout them Met's "........jackass!

Thanks Everybody.

Game On

Many of you already know but I got the good news on wenesday that my last petscan showed no sign of tumors. What this means is that the chemotherapy did it's job and shrunk the tumors even better than we hoped. It doesnt mean that they are gone entirely and that's why radiation will be the net step in my road to recovery. Starting September 29th I begin 15 days of radiation Mon-Fri for 3 weeks. It isn't as painful or dibilitating as chemo but does come with some danger and side effects. Seems 2 of the tumors have surrounded my esophogus (wind pipe) so radiation will be directed to this area as well as my neck and chest. The radiologist says it will do some damage and I may not be able to eat after awhile. It could mean being fed through an I.V. down the road but I made it quite clear to him that a feeding tube would cause him harm and result in his eventual demise hence I believe the Doc and me have come to a mutual agreement on that issue. Otherwise it will just mean being very tired and more weight loss and that's ok because it will make me better. Looks like i'll be able to enjoy the holidays this year and should be good as new by February or March next year. Hopefully the words "play ball" will echo in my ear come spring 2009. Something to look forward to for sure.

Thank you needs to be sent to so many I don't know where to begin. Support has come from so many people and so many places. Prayers have rung about and Churches have done masses and I'm so thankful. I've heard from those nearby and far away, friends from my present and past. Everyone has stepped up with encouragement and support an you'll never know what a difference it makes on a daily basis. I got to tell the nurses I was in remission and I looked around at the chemo patients who were listening and they had a look of relief on their faces that said good for you my friend, good for you. That meant alot to me. We form a quiet bond as patients and quietly root for each other because we know of each others pain. I will be rooting for all of them and wish them he same success I've had thus far.

I'm hopeful to make Califonia the week of October 23-26 although it may be dicey if I can't eat or swallow. Just one more challenge I guess. Please know that I've stayed strong and haven't wavered in my faith or my beliefs. You guys keep me focused towards my goal of beating this thing and I'm well on our way.

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

HOME RUN

As many of you know, we met with Billy's Oncologist today to get his Petscan results. The doctor walked in and gave him a "high five". He said he is in "total remission". The scans were completely free, which is better than they were expecting. He does still have to do radiation to eradicate anything possibly left behind. That is scheduled to begin on Sept 29. He will go for 3 weeks in a row taking the weekends off, and then he is DONE! There will be testing in between, and testing after for the next 2 years. Then once a year til he is free for 5 years. The radiation isn't the funnest thing to do. It is still dangerous, it will burn his skin and make it hard to swallow. There is a risk for damaging his heart and increased risk of lung cancer, but that is minimal. They think he will loose some more weight (he is at 158lbs). All in all it was a good meeting followed by a celebration of Margaritas and wings! We should all expect to see him back on the ball field in the Spring.
As always... Thanks for your support!